Sometimes the Internet’s wonderful. And sometimes, it doesn’t have the back alley mime fight you’re looking for.
The 5 Most Annoying Flaws of Modern Internet Search Engines
#4. Too Much Like a More-Popular Result
For years I’ve been trying to remember what the hell the name was of that childhood movie or TV show where a street gang battled a gang of mimes in an abandoned theater. These mimes fought with mirrors and smoke bombs and ultimately got their asses kicked. Well if you search it, you get…
Well, I can see why the Internet is confused, because The Warriors is about gangs, and it has a gang called The Hi-Hats who are mimes, but no, that’s not what I’m talking about. Yes, I’m looking for a movie about fighting mimes that is not the most famous movie of all time to feature fighting mimes.
As much as they get picked on, at least Bing and Apple Maps aren’t building Skynet.
5 Evil Ways Google and Facebook Are Using Their Insane Power
#5. They’re Both Developing Terrifying Technology
You know how supervillains have underground labs full of mad scientists? Well, Google has the Google X facility, where people who would have felt right at home in the Manhattan Project develop impossible (so far) ideas like hoverboards, space elevators, and freaking teleportation. Not impossible: Google’s own robot army. Between solar-powered drones that can “fly for years” and robo-beasts that run at 29 miles an hour, it’s starting to look like the only thing Terminator got wrong is that the T-800s didn’t mock your weird porn history before crushing your skull.