Let Alex take you inside the Cracked creative process (and apologize for that font).
New Guy Weekly: Pier Thoughts

Let Alex take you inside the Cracked creative process (and apologize for that font).

New Guy Weekly: Pier Thoughts

startthemachine:

sixpenceee:

white-wid0w:

sixpenceee:

Cracked.com has been a great source of entertainment for me in high school. Their articles are written in a comical way that will make you laugh as much as it makes you learn. 
The 7 Most Unintentionally Creepy Places on the Internet: These are seven websites that prove the internet can still make the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end (contains slurs)
5 Real Murders More Terrifying Than Any Other Horror Movie: Real killers are real scary
Creepiest Urban Legends That Happen to be True: (Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 3)(Part 4)(Part 5)(Part 6)(Part 7)
6 Terrifying Experiment Parents Did On Their Own Kids: Some people’s actions really make me wonder
5 Most Terrifying Diseases Doctors Can’t Explain: The oddities that exist in our world
Creepiest Places on Earth: (Part 1)(Part 2)
The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth: My personal favorite
The 6 Strangely Convincing Real Life Curses: Coincidence or something more?
The 7 Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories From Around the World: A cultural experience
The 5 Creepiest Disappearances That No One Can Explain: It’s like they vanished into thin air

It’s that time of year again

It’s always that time of year on my blog

We’ve got even more spooky learnings in store for you this year.

^^^WHAT HE SAID^^^

startthemachine:

sixpenceee:

white-wid0w:

sixpenceee:

Cracked.com has been a great source of entertainment for me in high school. Their articles are written in a comical way that will make you laugh as much as it makes you learn. 

  1. The 7 Most Unintentionally Creepy Places on the Internet: These are seven websites that prove the internet can still make the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end (contains slurs)
  2. 5 Real Murders More Terrifying Than Any Other Horror Movie: Real killers are real scary
  3. Creepiest Urban Legends That Happen to be True: (Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 3)(Part 4)(Part 5)(Part 6)(Part 7)
  4. 6 Terrifying Experiment Parents Did On Their Own Kids: Some people’s actions really make me wonder
  5. 5 Most Terrifying Diseases Doctors Can’t Explain: The oddities that exist in our world
  6. Creepiest Places on Earth: (Part 1)(Part 2)
  7. The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on EarthMy personal favorite
  8. The 6 Strangely Convincing Real Life CursesCoincidence or something more?
  9. The 7 Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories From Around the WorldA cultural experience
  10. The 5 Creepiest Disappearances That No One Can Explain: It’s like they vanished into thin air

It’s that time of year again

It’s always that time of year on my blog

We’ve got even more spooky learnings in store for you this year.

^^^WHAT HE SAID^^^

Grab our old book for an amazing Daily Deal price at Audible.com today!
Also, sorry to break it to you like this, but, um…you really might be.

Grab our old book for an amazing Daily Deal price at Audible.com today!

Also, sorry to break it to you like this, but, um…you really might be.

While the rest of us were in Nashville our new guy filmed a totally normal behind-the-scenes minute in the Cracked office! Get a load of how normal it is!

While the rest of us were in Nashville our new guy filmed a totally normal behind-the-scenes minute in the Cracked office! Get a load of how normal it is!

cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE
This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.
The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

“Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.
Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was
followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.
ALSO also?

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.
And yet…

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE

This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.

The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.

Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was

followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

image

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.

ALSO also?

image

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.

And yet…

image

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

cracked:

silly-little-science:

cracked:

NASHVILLE: come see us do comedy, music, and a podcast live! And meet us too (no touching of DOB’s face)!

But can I touch sorenbowie's face

Depends if your reflexes are fast enough

This is tonight and you can get a $5 ticket right here.

cracked:

silly-little-science:

cracked:

NASHVILLE: come see us do comedy, music, and a podcast live! And meet us too (no touching of DOB’s face)!

But can I touch sorenbowie's face

Depends if your reflexes are fast enough

This is tonight and you can get a $5 ticket right here.

Is there any chance that after the show at Zanies tomorrow some of the Cracked cast might stick around to do a sort of meet & greet with the audience? Or is that asking too much?

It’s partly up to the club BUT we’ve been talking to them about it and we’re planning on hanging out after for as long as our collective social anxiety can stand it.

(If you don’t know what we’re talking about with nerrrdstark, we’re doing a live show in Nashville tomorrow and would love to probably meet you at it.)

Couple of $5 tickets left for whoever jumps on them first.
And to those swift sons’a bitches who do, we say well done and see you tomorrow.

Couple of $5 tickets left for whoever jumps on them first.

And to those swift sons’a bitches who do, we say well done and see you tomorrow.

Yooo, tell me more about cinema sins. I mean, yeah, I could google it, but I just dropped a couple of hot Hamiltons to see you guys on Wednesday, and I'm curious about this other little troupe.

thisdanobrien:

cracked:

Hey buddy! See you Wednesday!

(To anyone reading this and feeling confused, we have a joint live show with CinemaSins at Zanies Nashville on Wednesday. Tickets are even cheaper for our Tumblr friends.)

And CinemaSins breaks down everything wrong with a movie as quickly/specifically/brilliantly as possible, occasionally for us and mainly on their killer YouTube channel. Check them out. Run don’t walk. Honestly jealous today’s the day you see their stuff for the first time.

Tickets are going fast for this show and we’re expecting a lot of walk ins, so get your tickets now! There are two stages of anxiety I have for every show, and we’ve recently entered the second. Here they are:

Stage One: No one is going to come to this show, it’s just going to be me on stage plus some drunks that wandered in by mistake and maybe every bully I’ve ever had. I’m going to perform for eight people who won’t laugh and the promoter will be mad at me and everyone will be mad and I will have done a bad job. I wish I’d never agreed to do this.

Stage Two: We sold how many tickets? Oh, shit that’s a lot. Oh no. Okay. Oh no. That’s a lot of people to disappoint, okay, crap, farts, oh no. What if i do a terrible job and they’re all mad? What if I do a GREAT job and they want to talk to me after? How do I make sure I’m the thing they want me to be? Oh no. I wish I’d never agreed to do this.


Anyway I hope you like my jokes. Performing live is my favorite thing to do that will ultimately kill me from the inside out.

God damnit cracked, come to New York and do things here.

We did a stand-up show there earlier this year! Also DOB will be there mid-October. And we’re usually in town for the Webbys (if we’re nominated (which we tend to be (because our fans are the greatest))).

And we’d love to put on another NYC show soon, especially if this Nashville show (tickets still available) turns out to be a fun time. Any place you’d recommend we do it?