startthemachine:

sixpenceee:

white-wid0w:

sixpenceee:

Cracked.com has been a great source of entertainment for me in high school. Their articles are written in a comical way that will make you laugh as much as it makes you learn. 
The 7 Most Unintentionally Creepy Places on the Internet: These are seven websites that prove the internet can still make the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end (contains slurs)
5 Real Murders More Terrifying Than Any Other Horror Movie: Real killers are real scary
Creepiest Urban Legends That Happen to be True: (Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 3)(Part 4)(Part 5)(Part 6)(Part 7)
6 Terrifying Experiment Parents Did On Their Own Kids: Some people’s actions really make me wonder
5 Most Terrifying Diseases Doctors Can’t Explain: The oddities that exist in our world
Creepiest Places on Earth: (Part 1)(Part 2)
The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth: My personal favorite
The 6 Strangely Convincing Real Life Curses: Coincidence or something more?
The 7 Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories From Around the World: A cultural experience
The 5 Creepiest Disappearances That No One Can Explain: It’s like they vanished into thin air

It’s that time of year again

It’s always that time of year on my blog

We’ve got even more spooky learnings in store for you this year.

^^^WHAT HE SAID^^^

startthemachine:

sixpenceee:

white-wid0w:

sixpenceee:

Cracked.com has been a great source of entertainment for me in high school. Their articles are written in a comical way that will make you laugh as much as it makes you learn. 

  1. The 7 Most Unintentionally Creepy Places on the Internet: These are seven websites that prove the internet can still make the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end (contains slurs)
  2. 5 Real Murders More Terrifying Than Any Other Horror Movie: Real killers are real scary
  3. Creepiest Urban Legends That Happen to be True: (Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 3)(Part 4)(Part 5)(Part 6)(Part 7)
  4. 6 Terrifying Experiment Parents Did On Their Own Kids: Some people’s actions really make me wonder
  5. 5 Most Terrifying Diseases Doctors Can’t Explain: The oddities that exist in our world
  6. Creepiest Places on Earth: (Part 1)(Part 2)
  7. The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on EarthMy personal favorite
  8. The 6 Strangely Convincing Real Life CursesCoincidence or something more?
  9. The 7 Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories From Around the WorldA cultural experience
  10. The 5 Creepiest Disappearances That No One Can Explain: It’s like they vanished into thin air

It’s that time of year again

It’s always that time of year on my blog

We’ve got even more spooky learnings in store for you this year.

^^^WHAT HE SAID^^^

cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE
This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.
The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

“Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.
Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was
followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.
ALSO also?

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.
And yet…

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE

This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.

The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.

Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was

followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

image

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.

ALSO also?

image

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.

And yet…

image

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

thisdanobrien:

cracked:

NASHVILLE: We will be in you Sept. 24th at 7:30pm. Our resident rapper-laureate MS Werd (Michael Swaim) is bringing Soren Bowie, Cody Johnston, Jack O’Brien, Daniel O’Brien, David Wong and more of your site favorites to Zanies Nashville with a veritable assfull of stand-up comedy, music, factoids, un-aired sketches, panels, podcasts, and list-formatted musings. Come meet the gang, hear some things, see some things, think some things, and who knows…maybe even feel some things, too.* It’s the biggest CRACKED show ever, and it’s happening near you! OH, FRABJOUS DAY!
*Not a guarantee. Offer not valid for sociopaths.

That’s right! We’ve heard your requests to bring the Cracked Live Experience on the road and we decided “Okay will go to one other place.” Come see us in Nashville next month doing jokes, signing things, running around and eating very spicy chicken. I’ll be performing ten minutes of brand new stand-up and 24 hours of not new being uncomfortable in crowds.

thisdanobrien:

cracked:

NASHVILLE: We will be in you Sept. 24th at 7:30pmOur resident rapper-laureate MS Werd (Michael Swaim) is bringing Soren Bowie, Cody Johnston, Jack O’Brien, Daniel O’Brien, David Wong and more of your site favorites to Zanies Nashville with a veritable assfull of stand-up comedy, music, factoids, un-aired sketches, panels, podcasts, and list-formatted musings. Come meet the gang, hear some things, see some things, think some things, and who knows…maybe even feel some things, too.* It’s the biggest CRACKED show ever, and it’s happening near you! OH, FRABJOUS DAY!

*Not a guarantee. Offer not valid for sociopaths.

That’s right! We’ve heard your requests to bring the Cracked Live Experience on the road and we decided “Okay will go to one other place.” Come see us in Nashville next month doing jokes, signing things, running around and eating very spicy chicken. I’ll be performing ten minutes of brand new stand-up and 24 hours of not new being uncomfortable in crowds.
NASHVILLE: We will be in you Sept. 24th at 7:30pm. Our resident rapper-laureate MS Werd (Michael Swaim) is bringing Soren Bowie, Cody Johnston, Jack O’Brien, Daniel O’Brien, David Wong and more of your site favorites to Zanies Nashville with a veritable assfull of stand-up comedy, music, factoids, un-aired sketches, panels, podcasts, and list-formatted musings. Come meet the gang, hear some things, see some things, think some things, and who knows…maybe even feel some things, too.* It’s the biggest CRACKED show ever, and it’s happening near you! OH, FRABJOUS DAY!
*Not a guarantee. Offer not valid for sociopaths.

NASHVILLE: We will be in you Sept. 24th at 7:30pmOur resident rapper-laureate MS Werd (Michael Swaim) is bringing Soren Bowie, Cody Johnston, Jack O’Brien, Daniel O’Brien, David Wong and more of your site favorites to Zanies Nashville with a veritable assfull of stand-up comedy, music, factoids, un-aired sketches, panels, podcasts, and list-formatted musings. Come meet the gang, hear some things, see some things, think some things, and who knows…maybe even feel some things, too.* It’s the biggest CRACKED show ever, and it’s happening near you! OH, FRABJOUS DAY!

*Not a guarantee. Offer not valid for sociopaths.

From the worst dating profile ever created to the ultimate Tarantino revenge fantasy and Breaking Bad for kids, here are Cracked director Adam Ganser’s favorite videos.

Wanna time travel? We’re collecting our publication’s baby pictures on Pinterest.

Wanna time travel? We’re collecting our publication’s baby pictures on Pinterest.

Yes, that’s the correct year. In 1958 President Eisenhower was still writing his military-industrial complex speech, the Giants and Dodgers were playing their first seasons in California, and Cracked The Magazine began its mission to be better-ish than Mad Magazine through totally original imitation. We’ve come a long way and become a completely different thing since then, but we haven’t forgotten that our brand’s got an old school pre-Internet vibe that’s totally classic. We’re printing this design by Mattographer in four colors, all of them in limited quantities (and the swellest typeface we could find). Get one before we run out, or only have that color you don’t think looks good on you. You know the one. [GET IT HERE]

Yes, that’s the correct year. In 1958 President Eisenhower was still writing his military-industrial complex speech, the Giants and Dodgers were playing their first seasons in California, and Cracked The Magazine began its mission to be better-ish than Mad Magazine through totally original imitation. We’ve come a long way and become a completely different thing since then, but we haven’t forgotten that our brand’s got an old school pre-Internet vibe that’s totally classic. We’re printing this design by Mattographer in four colors, all of them in limited quantities (and the swellest typeface we could find). Get one before we run out, or only have that color you don’t think looks good on you. You know the one. [GET IT HERE]

blackandgoldkeywork:

cracked:

ucbcomedy:

This #rules. Check out this new video from our friends at Cracked, and never fret about how to name your fictional characters again. 

Awwwww UCB! You are true friends also what’s Amy Poehler like?

Cracked will be forever brilliant

So will you, stranger. So will you.

startthemachine:

Represent.

We’ve got a whole pin board for those old magazine covers, because even though we’re not that same publication anymore, we like fun illustrations like this as much as the next former-joke-mag:

startthemachine:

Represent.

We’ve got a whole pin board for those old magazine covers, because even though we’re not that same publication anymore, we like fun illustrations like this as much as the next former-joke-mag:

Wow, they’ll put anyone on The Daily Show these days. (x)

Wow, they’ll put anyone on The Daily Show these days. (x)