And just like that, the government did something?
4 Reasons Timecop is a Modern Masterpiece

#3. Time Travel Is Not the Most Improbable Thing in Timecop
For instance, right at the beginning of the movie we’re treated to a closed-door meeting of harrumphing politicians as they simultaneously learn that time travel has been invented and decide to earmark a quarter of the national budget to defend it from terrorists. … No one is disputing the idea that a waddle-necked team of politicians would approve the expense of billions of dollars on the defense of an impossible technology. That would absolutely happen, because that’s how we understand things in America. However, nobody even has any time machines yet. America doesn’t even have any time machines yet. The head of the time-machine committee literally just strolls into the office and hands them a business proposal. Thirty seconds earlier, he was one of maybe three people on the planet who knew time travel existed. Now he asks four members of congress for a hundred fortunes to outfit a time-slipping defense league, and they approve it without discussion. I’ve seen more intense arguments over which Rocky sequel to watch.

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And just like that, the government did something?

4 Reasons Timecop is a Modern Masterpiece

#3. Time Travel Is Not the Most Improbable Thing in Timecop

For instance, right at the beginning of the movie we’re treated to a closed-door meeting of harrumphing politicians as they simultaneously learn that time travel has been invented and decide to earmark a quarter of the national budget to defend it from terrorists. … No one is disputing the idea that a waddle-necked team of politicians would approve the expense of billions of dollars on the defense of an impossible technology. That would absolutely happen, because that’s how we understand things in America. However, nobody even has any time machines yet. America doesn’t even have any time machines yet. The head of the time-machine committee literally just strolls into the office and hands them a business proposal. Thirty seconds earlier, he was one of maybe three people on the planet who knew time travel existed. Now he asks four members of congress for a hundred fortunes to outfit a time-slipping defense league, and they approve it without discussion. I’ve seen more intense arguments over which Rocky sequel to watch.

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cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE
This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.
The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

“Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.
Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was
followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.
ALSO also?

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.
And yet…

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

cervine-canine:

pungoeshere:

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE

This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.

The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.

Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was

followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

image

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.

ALSO also?

image

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.

And yet…

image

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

i’ve seen people make fun of cracked for it’s list format and some other stuff, but damn if they don’t thoroughly research the topics they make jokes about. funny AND informative.

I love cracked, actually.

Meh. Not sold on ‘em yet

"Hmm. Lot of obstacles today."
32 Things Awful People Secretly Suspect About the World
At left: the orcs we could have had in The Hobbit. At right: what Peter Jackson stamped out instead.
4 Reasons Movie Special FX Are Actually Getting Worse

#4. Visual Effects Are Making Even the Best Filmmakers Lazy
As we’ve mentioned before, Peter Jackson’s attention to detail on the Lord of the Rings trilogy was so insane that every armor was crafted based on the backstory of an orc, most of which were onscreen for a whole six frames before being decapitated — not only that, costume designers painstakingly handcrafted over six miles (for metric enthusiasts, that’s “a shitload of kilometers”) of chain mail, just so that they could put them on orc actors who would be wearing armor over the mail, at night, in the rain. After Jackson was dragged kicking and screaming back to the director’s chair for The Hobbit, though, he said to hell with that and created all the orcs in nice and easy (for him) CGI. Hence the buttlord in the screencap above.

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At left: the orcs we could have had in The Hobbit. At right: what Peter Jackson stamped out instead.

4 Reasons Movie Special FX Are Actually Getting Worse

#4. Visual Effects Are Making Even the Best Filmmakers Lazy

As we’ve mentioned before, Peter Jackson’s attention to detail on the Lord of the Rings trilogy was so insane that every armor was crafted based on the backstory of an orc, most of which were onscreen for a whole six frames before being decapitated — not only that, costume designers painstakingly handcrafted over six miles (for metric enthusiasts, that’s “a shitload of kilometers”) of chain mail, just so that they could put them on orc actors who would be wearing armor over the mail, at night, in the rain. After Jackson was dragged kicking and screaming back to the director’s chair for The Hobbit, though, he said to hell with that and created all the orcs in nice and easy (for him) CGI. Hence the buttlord in the screencap above.

Read More

And the worst part? You’re too nice to recline your seat back straight into their jerk face.
32 Things Awful People Secretly Suspect About the World

And the worst part? You’re too nice to recline your seat back straight into their jerk face.

32 Things Awful People Secretly Suspect About the World

“Those people exist right now. We call them alcoholics.”

Why Weed Legalization Is Terrible for Weed Smokers

thisdanobrien:

Guess what’s comin’ back, y’all?

And we were like

thisdanobrien:

Guess what’s comin’ back, y’all?

And we were like

If you had a weapons research budget and all the latitude in the world, you’d build robot-killin’ lasers too.
5 Sci-Fi Weapons (That Already Exist)

#5. Lasers on Everything
The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) is experimenting with mounting laser cannons on planes, if for no other reason than to give those awful people who shine laser pointers at airborne planes a taste of their own medicine. But then again, when you think about it, pilots are such a thing of the past. Drones are the future. We’ve already put bombs and machine guns on them, why not lasers? Recently U.S. Air Force captain and drone pilot Michael Byrnes explained in a military magazine how unmanned laser drones could be the future of aerial dogfighting. So, soon every air battle will be like Top Gun, but if Maverick was a robot and the planes burned up mysteriously because technically you won’t even be able to see the laser.
But what if we create this technology and it falls into enemy hands? Simple: Just equip Hummers with anti-drone lasers. That way when our creation comes back to kill us like some Frankenstein monster made out of pure energy, we can take it out with EVEN MORE LASERS.

Read More

If you had a weapons research budget and all the latitude in the world, you’d build robot-killin’ lasers too.

5 Sci-Fi Weapons (That Already Exist)

#5. Lasers on Everything

The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) is experimenting with mounting laser cannons on planes, if for no other reason than to give those awful people who shine laser pointers at airborne planes a taste of their own medicine. But then again, when you think about it, pilots are such a thing of the past. Drones are the future. We’ve already put bombs and machine guns on them, why not lasers? Recently U.S. Air Force captain and drone pilot Michael Byrnes explained in a military magazine how unmanned laser drones could be the future of aerial dogfighting. So, soon every air battle will be like Top Gun, but if Maverick was a robot and the planes burned up mysteriously because technically you won’t even be able to see the laser.

But what if we create this technology and it falls into enemy hands? Simple: Just equip Hummers with anti-drone lasers. That way when our creation comes back to kill us like some Frankenstein monster made out of pure energy, we can take it out with EVEN MORE LASERS.

Read More

Turning on the lights? Weirdly, you’re turning on the calories.
5 Everyday Things That Are Secretly Making You Fat

#5. The Lights in Your Bedroom
Researchers at Ohio State University made this discovery by messing with the sleep cycles of mice. One group got to sleep in darkness, while the other had to snooze in roughly the equivalent of a cheap strip club. Not only did the mice exposed to light gain weight but they actually increased their body mass a full 50 percent. In eight weeks. Oh, and they also showed signs of impaired glucose tolerance, which of course is science-speak for two heaping scoops of diabetes.

Read More

Turning on the lights? Weirdly, you’re turning on the calories.

5 Everyday Things That Are Secretly Making You Fat

#5. The Lights in Your Bedroom

Researchers at Ohio State University made this discovery by messing with the sleep cycles of mice. One group got to sleep in darkness, while the other had to snooze in roughly the equivalent of a cheap strip club. Not only did the mice exposed to light gain weight but they actually increased their body mass a full 50 percent. In eight weeks. Oh, and they also showed signs of impaired glucose tolerance, which of course is science-speak for two heaping scoops of diabetes.

Read More