You know The Warriors? Okay now imagine it’s not full of interesting characters, and it’s destroying your monthly budget.
4 Reasons You’ll Never Escape Your F***ing Cable Company

#3. You Probably Have No Other Cable Company to Choose
If you had a bad experience with one of the big companies, you can switch to another, right? For most of the country, no. During a recent congressional hearing on a Comcast-Time Warner merger, the Comcast CEO actually said that the merger would not squeeze any competitors out because each company already sticks to its territory. Just like gang members, or the most boring game of Risk ever.

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You know The Warriors? Okay now imagine it’s not full of interesting characters, and it’s destroying your monthly budget.

4 Reasons You’ll Never Escape Your F***ing Cable Company

#3. You Probably Have No Other Cable Company to Choose

If you had a bad experience with one of the big companies, you can switch to another, right? For most of the country, no. During a recent congressional hearing on a Comcast-Time Warner merger, the Comcast CEO actually said that the merger would not squeeze any competitors out because each company already sticks to its territory. Just like gang members, or the most boring game of Risk ever.

Read More

If you hate brussels sprouts, grow up. No, really, growing up is a solution.
6 Picky Eating Habits You Can Fix (And Not Just With Bacon)

#6. Brussels Sprouts
Brussels sprouts taste quite a bit more bitter than other vegetables, and as bitterness is one of those fundamental tastes that kids don’t like, almost everyone’s first contact with Brussels sprouts is an unpleasant one. … Because bitterness becomes more palatable with age, try Brussels sprouts out again if it’s been a decade or two since you last threw them back in your grandmother’s face, because you might find you like them now.

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If you hate brussels sprouts, grow up. No, really, growing up is a solution.

6 Picky Eating Habits You Can Fix (And Not Just With Bacon)

#6. Brussels Sprouts

Brussels sprouts taste quite a bit more bitter than other vegetables, and as bitterness is one of those fundamental tastes that kids don’t like, almost everyone’s first contact with Brussels sprouts is an unpleasant one. … Because bitterness becomes more palatable with age, try Brussels sprouts out again if it’s been a decade or two since you last threw them back in your grandmother’s face, because you might find you like them now.

Read More

"Last weekend was pretty cool, because my alma mater was the subject of a front-page story in the New York Times. Unfortunately, they got there because they utterly shit the bed at handling a sexual assault case." — JF Sargent
5 Uncomfortable Truths About Rape on College Campuses

#5. Doing the Right Thing Will Hurt the Colleges
Rape reports going up is actually a good thing. Feel free to quote me on that. The reason an increase in rape reports is a sign that things are getting better is because it’s actually getting reported. Sexual assault is one of the most underreported crimes in the world, with only 40 percent of cases ever going beyond private conversation, and 1 in 5 women have been sexually assaulted — a number that’s always seemed a little lower than what’s real to me, frankly, but that’s just speaking from anecdotal evidence. So as these reports go up, they’re actually trending toward reflecting the actual amount of sexual assaults that happen. It’s roughly analogous to realizing your home has cockroaches: It’s a painful shock, but at least you now know to buy some bug poison.

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"Last weekend was pretty cool, because my alma mater was the subject of a front-page story in the New York Times. Unfortunately, they got there because they utterly shit the bed at handling a sexual assault case." — JF Sargent

5 Uncomfortable Truths About Rape on College Campuses

#5. Doing the Right Thing Will Hurt the Colleges

Rape reports going up is actually a good thing. Feel free to quote me on that. The reason an increase in rape reports is a sign that things are getting better is because it’s actually getting reported. Sexual assault is one of the most underreported crimes in the world, with only 40 percent of cases ever going beyond private conversation, and 1 in 5 women have been sexually assaulted — a number that’s always seemed a little lower than what’s real to me, frankly, but that’s just speaking from anecdotal evidence. So as these reports go up, they’re actually trending toward reflecting the actual amount of sexual assaults that happen. It’s roughly analogous to realizing your home has cockroaches: It’s a painful shock, but at least you now know to buy some bug poison.

Read More

The new Cracked Podcast digs into why every “great” television show’s sad now (in the funniest way possible). And since we’re more than just TV nerds, we soundtracked it to our favorite new music:

Hear that Hurt Everybody track in this post (and download their free EP here). And hear those other tracks along with the rest of our curated song picks on the Cracked Podcast’s Spotify playlist.

It turns out mourning isn’t on as predictable a path as one of those tacos marauding its way through your body.
5 Ridiculous Lies You Probably Believe About Psychology

#4. People Do Not Grieve in Five Stages
The five stages are something one lone psychiatrist came up with in the 1960s for a book she was writing. There’s no evidence for it; it’s just something she thought she observed … while watching people in a completely different situation.
Here, ask yourself: Is there a stage that seems to be missing here? Well, how about the one where you yearn for the person to be alive again? As in, the emotion you actually feel the most after someone dies? Well, it’s not there because the five stages weren’t supposed to apply to people mourning the loss of others — they are emotions the terminally ill express when facing their own deaths.

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It turns out mourning isn’t on as predictable a path as one of those tacos marauding its way through your body.

5 Ridiculous Lies You Probably Believe About Psychology

#4. People Do Not Grieve in Five Stages

The five stages are something one lone psychiatrist came up with in the 1960s for a book she was writing. There’s no evidence for it; it’s just something she thought she observed … while watching people in a completely different situation.

Here, ask yourself: Is there a stage that seems to be missing here? Well, how about the one where you yearn for the person to be alive again? As in, the emotion you actually feel the most after someone dies? Well, it’s not there because the five stages weren’t supposed to apply to people mourning the loss of others — they are emotions the terminally ill express when facing their own deaths.

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You’re looking at the marine life version of overwhelming swag.
5 Animals That Have Learned How to Keep Pets

#4. Emperor Shrimps Ride Other Creatures Like They’re Horses
Emperor shrimps are natural hitchhikers, and they’ll ride just about anything in a pinch (they might even choose you, which is certainly a better fate than if a shark decided to do so) — but their ideal whip is some venomous creature, like a sea cucumber, medusa worm, or nudibranch. Those animals are usually brightly colored, a striking visual that can easily convince potential predators to stay the fuck away or risk a very painful death indeed.

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You’re looking at the marine life version of overwhelming swag.

5 Animals That Have Learned How to Keep Pets

#4. Emperor Shrimps Ride Other Creatures Like They’re Horses

Emperor shrimps are natural hitchhikers, and they’ll ride just about anything in a pinch (they might even choose you, which is certainly a better fate than if a shark decided to do so) — but their ideal whip is some venomous creature, like a sea cucumber, medusa worm, or nudibranch. Those animals are usually brightly colored, a striking visual that can easily convince potential predators to stay the fuck away or risk a very painful death indeed.

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cracked:

Royal Baby Name Roots by ohmygodwaytoolong

Happy birthday to that prince kid.

So colchrishadfield wrote a Cracked article and it’s amazing.

So colchrishadfield wrote a Cracked article and it’s amazing.

Oppenheimer had balls. Or at least ball.
29 Images That Will Change How You Picture History

Oppenheimer had balls. Or at least ball.

29 Images That Will Change How You Picture History

Before you call someone a hipster, make sure you know that prism thingy’s more than a t-shirt.
4 Things the Internet Always Gets Wrong (Explained)

#3. The Internet Doesn’t Know What “Hipster” Means
Aside from generalizations about fashion (tight jeans, androgynous shaggy haircuts, and thick framed glasses), hipsters espouse a counterculture aesthetic. They value more obscure forms of art and entertainment. In a sentence, the hipster prides himself on knowing what the cool stuff is and knowing it before everyone else thought it was cool.
But too many people on the Internet seem to think a hipster is anyone who knows something you don’t. I’ve had people in the comments refer to me as a hipster for liking Pink Floyd. PINK FLOYD. One of the biggest acts of the 1970s, one of the best-selling artists of all time in one of the most popular forms of music in the 20th century. That’s not some obscure pick designed to impress. That’s me saying, yep, that band that’s always in everyone’s top 10 of classic rock, I love them, too, just like millions of other people.

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Before you call someone a hipster, make sure you know that prism thingy’s more than a t-shirt.

4 Things the Internet Always Gets Wrong (Explained)

#3. The Internet Doesn’t Know What “Hipster” Means

Aside from generalizations about fashion (tight jeans, androgynous shaggy haircuts, and thick framed glasses), hipsters espouse a counterculture aesthetic. They value more obscure forms of art and entertainment. In a sentence, the hipster prides himself on knowing what the cool stuff is and knowing it before everyone else thought it was cool.

But too many people on the Internet seem to think a hipster is anyone who knows something you don’t. I’ve had people in the comments refer to me as a hipster for liking Pink Floyd. PINK FLOYD. One of the biggest acts of the 1970s, one of the best-selling artists of all time in one of the most popular forms of music in the 20th century. That’s not some obscure pick designed to impress. That’s me saying, yep, that band that’s always in everyone’s top 10 of classic rock, I love them, too, just like millions of other people.

Read More